Around this time last year, I was on a plane, heading to Italy for what was one life altering experience in my late 20s. Tomorrow I will be experiencing what I believe to be the second shift in this journey of my late 20s. I had a purpose, I was renewed in spirit and God propelled things further than I could have imagined.
Now again I have that familiar growing pit in my stomach. Not to worry, it's all for good reasoning, and it's not a negative pit. It's a little like feeling hopeful of things to come: liking someone, but not knowing the outcome but still feeling really hopeful of the future to come.
I have tried stepping on that wavering water as much as humanly possible and at times have looked down and started sinking, but God's hand came for me. His hand came for my heart; my hope; my hand. So I yank myself up again through the wavering thoughts and walk again.
This trip feels like my key to something I have waited for. I don't know how to explain it without sounding so unrealistic, but the truth is even in the impossibility, there lies so much more possibility of hope and faith in my heart.
Creatively this is the push I have prayed for. I remember even writing years ago that I wanted to travel at least once a year. I saved up, paid for this trip in increments and have a little to spare for spending; not much because I still have to be an adult with other responsibilities, but I am very proud of myself. Just going for it!
When you pray for things unseen, and then you start to see them reveal themselves in front of you it almost seems surreal. I feel and believe all the things I have prayed for in my future that coincide with the Fathers will are beginning to take shape. Make sense. The things I struggled with in the past are behind me. I envision Portland to be a home away from home (my parents) and the community of people already revealing themselves to desire a deeper commitment in life.
I have slowly started making friends with Northwest photographers on Instagram. Commenting on pictures,having conversations about the city they live in and the city I will soon live in and such, and God creates bridges in the smallest of ways, you just have to keep your eyes open to recognize where he's building them.
If you've got goals, dreams, aspirations; go do. You are never too old, never too young, never too fast or slow to do what it is you want to do. Not doing it is wasting time and is failing. At least in trying, you will always know you tried and there is no harm in that.