Perks of Being A Wallflower..

I will say this, and maybe many times after this entry. I am absolutely positive that my heart belongs in Europe. I can't even begin to get the feeling out of my chest of how joyful I was to be in London.

Seriously JOYFUL!

I stepped out of the terminal, heard the temperature over the intercom stated by the pilot as -2ºC (28ºF), and all the cabin grumbled of the cold foggy weather. I rejoiced about the cold and foggy weather and started humming, "it's a foggy day in London town."

Why oh why did my heart feel this way? I did not know, nor was I aware that the capacity of my love for a country could grow immeasurably due to just the sight of the patchwork landscape that I had only seen in movies, and period piece dramas, and dreamed about.

I sat amongst people who had NO idea that I was possessing such joy in my heart just to hear them hold an normal conversation. A completely normal conversation. I think some may call it awkward, perhaps pathetic, or even a little weird. But I know that we've all had the feeling at some time or another with something that changes us. Makes us believe that we can take a leap of faith even if failure happens, but we do it anyways because nothing will ever make the desire go away, your heart just beats for it.

I rested for a couple of hours in the Gatwick, London airport, and people watched. I began to wonder about all of this time in my life, since the age of 10, how I have longed to be in England, and for 3 short hours it was made possible. Sure it was just the inside of an airport, but even still, I explored the mess out of that airport. I sat and observed. Even talked to complete strangers that graciously handed me a tissue during my sneezing fits at the charging station. How has this city managed to capture my affections for the last 17 years? How have the people managed to capture my affections for as long? For whatever reason, that affection is there. That sense of home was so present and I couldn't stop smiling.

I thought it would have ended in that airport until I boarded the plane for a 1 hour flight to Genoa, Geneva, Italy. We crossed over The Alps and I was in awe of God. I was sleepy, but managed to keep my tired and burning eyes pressed to that thick plastic window to look at what was below me. Every inch of that mountain made me smile. I was just thinking about how I felt at home. Home. You know if home is where your heart is, then God for sure knew when he created me, my heart belongs in the mountains.

Every time I see a city from my birdseye view, I imagine that I think I can see what God see's, but for a split moment He let's me see it that way. And shortly after catching a beautiful glimpse of the world through unfiltered glasses, I realize and understand how broad God's scope is of this world He created for us. That while He is looking and pursuing the hearts of people in Italy, He is pursuing hearts just as equally all the way in Hawaii. Our God is better than good, and greater than great. He is indescribably the most complex being that houses an immense capacity of love. I know the last paragraph doesn't tie the whole entry in, but I just had to say that.


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