Here I am, almost a full year from the last time I posted and definitely in a different mindset.
I'm in my car waiting for the rain to stop as I drive down back streets to start my errands a week before my sisters wedding. Yes, a lot has happened. The happiness I feel for my sister grows exponentially, but the weight I have in being dismissive of my own feelings lingers in the air.
A year ago, I was just getting to know a guy who took the time to get to know me and pursued me and it was an amazing thing to experience. The downside is that from time to time, I have an ache in my heart that will not lay still; it stirs up at the most inconvenient moments. I would equate the feeling to the same as having lost one of my childhood friends and not having words to describe the sweet memories, so I would just burst into tears.

 Dated March 10, 2016

I have no more to add to this but the feelings have subsided. I sent one last birthday present to my birthday twin this year (7.31.2017) I didn't expect anything in return, not even a text. I didn't want one, because I wanted to know it was final in my thoughts and in life. We were never destined to be anything else to each other but what we once were.

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