Its finally here

The start of June 2011. I told myself that I'm going to make this my month of fasting, praying, and seeking God. Clearly that's not just a once a month out of the year type thing, but for this particular reason, I feel as if God is doing something great right now in my life.
If anyone knows me, at this point in my life, I'm a recent jobless grad relying on my parents for support financially and mentally, and looking for work day in and day out. And if I'm not looking for work the regular old fashioned foot to pavement way, I'm looking at alternative ways to get work.
To go back to what I was saying, God is doing something great in my life. I still have yet to put my finger on it, but I'm changing, and I like the change I see in myself. I am being challenged spiritually and mentally and I like it. I am developing friendships in the most unforeseen ways and I like it.
All of that to say that I have to do this. God wants me to go deeper and search His heart, find out who He is, find out what my purpose is in Him, and once I do that, I will begin to understand why I must wait.
A month because in a dream I had, that was the appropriate amount of time I needed to step back and allow God to reconstruct me and hold my heart so tightly that I wouldn't feel content giving it to just anyone. A month for me to clear my head and see important things around me that I've been neglecting. A month because God can and will reveal himself to me even in a day, but why not let it be 30 days?
I take this as a challenge and I don't necessarily like it, but it will push me out of what I'm comfortable with, what I make a routine that serves no real purpose except selfishness. So here we go, countdown to the end of the rainbow and a peace that passes all understandings along the way. I'm prepared to have many epiphanies, many tears, and many yell at the top of my lungs frustrated moments with God.
Cheers to Waiting and being at rest.


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