Single Waiting

When I people watch, I like to observe family dynamics and couples with babies, and young married couples who can't take their eyes off each other. I like when I see the simple transactions between young married couples that reveal things that could be easily overlooked. I was eating breakfast at a cafe and spotted a younger married couple that had come in with a baby carrier that housed their 2 month old. The husband placed the infant on the bench next to where he sat; while the wife got up to make an order. The sun was up and shining, the first day it's been like that since I've paid my visit to the rainy city of Seattle and where the husband was located, the wife had the sun directly beaming into her face. He switched spots with her so that he was now sitting in the sun, and she was in the tiny cove of shade that was provided by the nook. I thought, about how sweet and simple that one moment was, that he cared so sincerely for her and her needs before his own. Wr...

Here I am, almost a full year from the last time I posted and definitely in a different mindset. I'm in my car waiting for the rain to stop as I drive down back streets to start my errands a week before my sisters wedding. Yes, a lot has happened. The happiness I feel for my sister grows exponentially, but the weight I have in being dismissive of my own feelings lingers in the air. A year ago, I was just getting to know a guy who took the time to get to know me and pursued me and it was an amazing thing to experience. The downside is that from time to time, I have an ache in my heart that will not lay still; it stirs up at the most inconvenient moments. I would equate the feeling to the same as having lost one of my childhood friends and not having words to describe the sweet memories, so I would just burst into tears. Dated March 10, 2016 I have no more to add to this but the feelings have subsided. I sent one last birthday present to my birthday twin this year (7.31.2017) I...

...and sometimes it doesn't. My last post was ashamedly 4 months ago. In that amount of time; I have acquired a new position at work and am now working 40 hours a week. My manager thinks I've got the potential of stepping into a management level role in the future. So that's pretty cool. In regards to my personal life, my fun-filled 2 month hang out session ended on a good note. Our birthday wishes were given to one another a couple of weeks ago and I figure that is the door closing. Friendship would be nice, but I will not actively force it if it isn't what the other person wants. I don't know what is in my future in that area. I have thought about it probably as much as I have since I was in high school. It's basically the same story over and over again of me single/friends married, engaged, dating, babies. And I basically don't want to hear anymore pep rally pep talks. I guess at some point it goes from cheering up to patronizing. I've also le...